Monday, September 8, 2008

Mental Storage Space

I like this blogging business. It makes me think about what's going on in my life. Why is it that the act of writing can help to clarify and focus thoughts? This blog prevents me from slipping into the cozy place in my mind where problems don't exist and I can ignore the elephant in the room.
Such a massive elephant too, it's kind of amazing we can still ignore something that size. I guess it's easier than trying to figure out how to squeeze it's big ass out the door.

S is at a group tonight and mentioned that he might hit an AA meting after that. There's one that he likes nearby, but this Monday night routine has also created opportunity in the past for S to drink, so I worry that it could be a trigger as well. We'll see. We had a good weekend though, so maybe that will carry him through a little longer. His appointment is Thursday with the pill doctor (can I just say that instead of phramo-psychologist? It takes too long to type and I don't know how to spell it.) I'm still trying not to get my hopes up too high for the meds, but it's hard not to imagine the possibilities. I can't even think of the possibility that she wouldn't prescribe anything.
Unfortunately, I think next week we should go back to the couples counselor. It's been a number of weeks, and we usually have a pretty constructive, if slightly torturous, hour. I guess that's what good therapy does though; it makes you look at and think about what's going on inside the ol' noggin. And couples therapy forces us to talk to each other about those pesky noggin thoughts. I'm not convinced we're getting it all out on our own right now. In fact, I'm pretty damn sure that both of us are holding back some feelings (no point in downplaying an obvious fact).

On another note, and a super exciting one at that, I've got my very first ever appointment to see an acupuncturist for my back. I'm really excited and I hope she can work some serious magic. Otherwise, I might be thinking about a career change.

Not a very exciting post, I'm afraid, but thanks for letting me get it out there.

Happy Fall!


Shadow said...

i sure have hope that between all the things you both are doing, something will give and you'll have a foundation of good to start building from.

i tried acupuncture once for a back spasm, surely not what you have, but it worked a charm. good luck there!!!

Kathy Lynne said...

Writing has really helped me.